I will admit that before all of this I was a very angry person. Out of all of my emotions, anger defiantly was dominate. I think this was because I never really knew any different. I never really exploded, unless I was at the end of my rope. Mostly I would get angry and bottle it up. I never took the time to learn how to express myself other than anger. This was because, my whole life I never really felt safe to speak up for myself.
After all of this, it gave me a chance to really see how much it crippled me as a person. It fogged my perception of the world around me. I didn’t realize how much negativity I created and how much of that I gravitated towards. My anger wasn’t just hurting myself, but of those around me. And I don’t feel like I was mean, but I think it made me not as open to them as I should be. Anger for me lead to so much of closed off feeling. I didn’t want people to really see what all was happening and being openly sad wasn’t going to happen for me.